to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
