Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize