windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
