pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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