Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
you never un-have a 4some
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
