in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
