Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Sober January is a disaster.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize