he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Randomize
