I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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