Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
