Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
