So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
