Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
