So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
