I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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