Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
