covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
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