I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
