I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
