I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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