Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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