all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
