Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
