Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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