Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
