you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
