He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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