Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Randomize
