I don't think brook has ever known best
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
