Is it because I queefed?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize