What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
