would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Where is the hickey?
well you can't waste a boner
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
