I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
