you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Randomize
