DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
