I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
