What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize