hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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