We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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