i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i just google imaged poop.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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