Buhtt sex?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
