That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize