I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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