fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My balls are so social today.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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