Your mouth is God's brothel.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize
