I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize