Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i think i just lost a toe
Randomize
