you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
