I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
