just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
