do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
