All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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