it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Randomize
